Posts Tagged :

relationship help

Is It Quitting Time? Resources to Help…
150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

Is it quitting time?  Or do you keep on pushing?It would be nice if the process of saving your marriage is straight-forward, direct, and without any bumps along the way.

Rarely is that the case.  Many times, it is 2 steps forward and 3 steps back, then 3 steps forward  and 2 steps back.  Sometimes, it can feel like nothing is moving.  Then, things lurch… even jump… forward.

The biggest risk?  Discouragement and frustration leading you to quit.  Friends and family encouraging you to quit.

No, you don’t have to keep on trying, indefinitely.  There are times when you might decide to quit.  But what you don’t want to happen is for your emotions to lead you to quit.  IF it comes to it, you want to decide to quit.  Not just feel like quitting.  But making a decision.

Otherwise, you want to make sure you keep heading forward.

And when you are frustrated, feeling discouraged, and listening to those “quit” messages, you may need some help staying on-course.

Below are some selected trainings to help you deal with those times.

Can This Marriage BE Saved?

When You Are Frustrated and Feel Like Giving Up…

When It Seems Easier To Just Quit and Walk Away…

When Discouragement Is Hitting Hard…

4 Fears That Stop Your Efforts

Dealing With NaySayers

3 Ways To Stay In The Game When You Want To Quit

7 Strategies When You Hear “This Will Never Work” and “I Don’t Love You”

Is It Time To Throw In The Towel?

Is It Too Late To Save Your Marriage?

Save The Marriage System

How Do You Know If Things Are Improving?
150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

How do you know that you are making progress in your efforts to save your marriage?  And at what point does it become unhealthy to work on your marriage?  When is it getting better and when is it unhealthy to keep trying??Phil asked, “How do you know you are making progress?”  And perhaps fearing that the signs point the other way, he also asked, “how long is long enough to be trying before it is unhealthy for me.”

Those are two great, if somewhat polarized, questions.  They point to fears of not being able to save a relationship.  What to look for?  And what to do if those signs are not there?

This can be a bit like staring into the crystal ball… or asking the magic mirror.  But these are such important questions that I wanted to answer Phil’s questions… at least as much as I can.  There are lots of dynamics and subtleties to a marriage and a spouse, it can be hard to be precise.

But I want to discuss some signs to look for, both in when there is progress and when it is becoming unhealthy.

Listen in for details in this episode of the podcast.

RELATED RESOURCES
Confusion or Connection
Showing Up
Having a Plan
Spouse Is NOT The Enemy
Save The Marriage System to Guide You

How Your Marriage Got Out of Shape
150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

How did your marriage get out of shape?How did it happen?  Your marriage, how did it get into trouble?  Probably not overnight.  Sure, you can point to a crisis — a fight, an “I’m not happy” talk, an affair discovered, divorce papers served.  But that crisis didn’t just pop up.

Your marriage probably got out of shape over time.