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Lee H. Baucom Ph.D.
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Beyond The 3 Barriers: Why Your Spouse Can’t See A Way Forward And How You Can Help Kindle Edition

by Lee H. Baucom (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 149 ratings
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What keeps a spouse from even considering saving their marriage? Why does one person think the marriage is worth saving and can be saved, while their spouse is stuck on believing the marriage is destined for failure?
Barriers block a spouse from seeing possibility, of seeing a path back to love and connection. That's the bad news. Those barriers (there are 3) keep a spouse from seeing the possibilities. The good news is the barriers need not be permanent.
If you want to save your marriage, you want to make sure those barriers do not get in your way. But you also need to understand how to help a spouse move beyond the 3 barriers.
In this brief and straightforward manual, Dr. Baucom tells you the 3 boundaries, so you understand why your spouse is stuck. But more importantly, you will quickly learn the 3 responses to the boundaries. Your response to each boundary makes the difference between stuck/failing and connection/love.
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  1. Print length
    32 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    May 6, 2020
  4. File size
    274 KB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
  8. See all details
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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0889KLYWD
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ May 6, 2020
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 274 KB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 32 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 149 ratings

About the author

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Lee H. Baucom Ph.D.

Lee H. Baucom Ph.D.

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Dr. Lee Baucom is the creator of the internet marriage program, Save The Marriage. Dr. Baucom has over a quarter of a century of experience helping couples and individuals learn to thrive. Dr. Baucom is trained as a therapist and life coach. In addition to therapy and coaching, Dr. Baucom has provided consultation for organizations and businesses. Dr. Baucom is also a popular speaker on a number of topics relating to thriving.

Dr. Baucom is happily married for over 30 years.. He and his wife have two adult children. In his spare time, Dr. Baucom scuba dives, paddleboards, trail runs, and practices jiu jitsu.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
149 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the advice in the pamphlet helpful and informative. They appreciate its concise length, which allows them to read it quickly and easily. The advice helps reduce the stress of making difficult decisions.

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AdviceLength
7 customers mention "Advice"7 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's advice. They find it informative and helpful for improving marriages. The advice is concise and clear, helping to put things in perspective.

"...This is a quick read but it gives small bursts of motivation and hope. Hope is what we lose first when we start searching for help in books...." Read more

"...I didn;t stop till the end. It hits home and clarifies some things to give anyone lost some perspective and hopefully some motivation and hope as it..." Read more

"Dr. Baucom has written another excellent marriage book that explains the barriers that spouses have to help save their marriage...." Read more

"There are so many little nuggets of wisdom in this pamphlet!..." Read more

3 customers mention "Length"3 positive0 negative

Customers find the book short enough to read quickly and easily.

"...This is short enough it can be read quickly and easily, while providing a measure of hope...." Read more

"...You can start to make things better. This is a great read that is short, to the point, and very informative. Thank you sir as always." Read more

"Short And Powerful..." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • alexnomore
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great read for those in need.
    Reviewed in the United States on May 9, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    I started reading Gary Chapmans works and they are good but his message didn’t speak to me. Amazon luckily pointed me in this direction and I purchased “How To Save Your Marriage In 3 Simple Steps” and I have been hooked on his words and messages since then. I feel his conversational like tone is like talking to someone at a pub or coffee house. He offers rational sound advice while giving you simple steps to try and practice.
    Every marriage has issues, and if you haven’t had any yet, someone isn’t communicating, and then you might be here looking for help.
    This is a quick read but it gives small bursts of motivation and hope. Hope is what we lose first when we start searching for help in books. He talks about the feelings you get when you seek professional help, I wish I would have read this before I went in, to prepare myself. He knows and understands the impossible road that has to be traveled.
    I’ll be sharing this book with the spouse, because it is easy and quick to the point. If someone is skeptical about fixing things, they will not want to read a long book, I know because I tried. This is short enough it can be read quickly and easily, while providing a measure of hope. He talks about not forcing a fix action in this book and his others, if you try to fix things and its not what the other person wants it’ll come off as being forced and make the person even angrier. It can set things back and also make everything worse with a dash of being unbearable. I hadn’t heard about just backing away and was blinded with the wrong course of action, I wish I would have known.

    The three barriers talked about are real. In each section he goes over what our spouse is experiencing such as hurting. Relationship pain can manifest into actualized physical pain. He talks about how to address it and a strategy how to help get past it. There is no simple or easy way to do it but he does mention in each section the amount of work and dedication it takes to make things work.

    I recommend this book as an introduction to his other books. It can help especially as panic mode kicks in. I don’t want to divulge much about this book, it came out today and I immediately bought it and it feels like every thing he writes about is about what I am going through. It helps take edge of all these serious choices, he talks about how we always have options. But when its you by yourself thinking how to fix things you feel like there are no choices and cant fathom any other way to fix things.
    To sum it up:
    Quick read
    Sound advice
    Things to try
    Hope
    Price
    7 people found this helpful
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  • Chapel Girl
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great place to get perspective
    Reviewed in the United States on May 11, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    This action-guide seemed like it was a fly on my wall, and knew exactly what has been taking place in my home. Everything it mentioned was on point, leaving my head nodding yes, yes, yes throughout the guide. It makes sense finally how only one person working for the marriage actually can and will work to heal both the marriage and yourself. It explains how when things start shifting , even though you may b e the only one doing the work yet feel like you shouldn't be the only one, it actually heals you too. Except the book puts it into way better terms. I have been wanting the Save My Marriage System by Lee Baucom for a few years now. So, I'm excited when something is released that I can afford. All Lee's work is amazing. Like he is the only person out there that actually understands what is really going on and don;'t try to sale anything other than what's really going to work. This guide is a perfect starting place for anyone lost in the wilderness of a failing marriage and failing attempts, and the word divorce comes out in every fight. When you can't see the forest for the trees in front of you, this book is a safe and useful navigational starting point. I rarely do exercises given in books, but for some reason I didn't hesitate in this one. Maybe because every word hit so close to home, I thought maybe if this guy knows this much, maybe I should listen to what he is trying to do. And the exercises were actually worthwhile and helpful to keep around all the time as reminders, even daily. It's just refreshing knowing someone gets it like he does. It does actually give you hope, which is mentioned in the guide. Hope to the hopeless. The guide is based on if your spouse feels stuck. But, doesn't forget to mention that the feeling is usually mutual. Only you are the one seeking the help so therefore maybe don't feel as stuck or hopeless as the spouse. So, I think that's why this guide focuses on the spouse. But its refreshing to see him not leave out the fact that I too feel stuck and hopeless. I just don;'t know what to do about it. Which is where so many marriages are, I'd imagine. In conclusion, this is a great read. I didn;t stop till the end. It hits home and clarifies some things to give anyone lost some perspective and hopefully some motivation and hope as it did me.
    5 people found this helpful
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  • Kindle Customer
    4.0 out of 5 stars Lovely Read
    Reviewed in the United States on January 4, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    4 Stars because when I started reading, I had already so much resentment, I couldn't do the exercises. Would have loved a section on working on your resentment first before the exercises.

    Will recommend and also include my review of working through my resentment before completing the exercises.
    One person found this helpful
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  • JT
    5.0 out of 5 stars Marriage Barriers Explained
    Reviewed in the United States on May 9, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    Dr. Baucom has written another excellent marriage book that explains the barriers that spouses have to help save their marriage. If you are a follower of Dr. Baucom, you will know that he seems to love the letter C when he explains things in his past books and podcast. This time he uses the letter H to explain the three barriers and how to get by them. He also explains, as he usually does, that you don’t have to wait for your spouse to start improving things in your marriage. You can start to make things better. This is a great read that is short, to the point, and very informative. Thank you sir as always.
    2 people found this helpful
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  • thealwaysfluffy
    5.0 out of 5 stars Sounds advice.
    Reviewed in the United States on April 10, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    There are so many little nuggets of wisdom in this pamphlet! The author just kind of matter of factly makes a statement about marriage and I'm thinking to myself : "I've never thought of it quiet like that!" This pamphlet really makes you think, so I decided to buy a couple more of his books!
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  • Marc A. Medley
    5.0 out of 5 stars Short And Powerful
    Reviewed in the United States on May 21, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    I absolutely connected with the recommendations made in this book, especially the myth of “No Contact.” I will definitely be checking out the podcast and the other resources listed. Excellent coaching in this book.
    One person found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • M. C. Tanner
    5.0 out of 5 stars great book!
    Reviewed in Germany on April 29, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    Excellent guide with no frills and practical tips. No BS. Good guidance IMHO
    Hope it works (for me & you)!
    Report
  • bhavesh
    5.0 out of 5 stars Dr Lee biochem is a master in marital relationship
    Reviewed in India on September 26, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    Dr Lee biochem has a complete
    understanding of marital relationship,he has deep knowledge of each and every aspect of life.
    Report
  • Northrl81
    5.0 out of 5 stars Offering hope and a practical start
    Reviewed in Canada on May 9, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    Well this was a very excellent guide on how to start moving your life in the right direction. Although targeting marital relationships I can see much of the advice and strategies applying to other aspects of life as well. Charles Snyder’s Hope Theory and the 3 C’s approach can really be applied to multiple areas of life. Lee offers an easily readable guide on barriers to moving forward as well as strategies to overcome these barriers that are concrete and doable. It is definitely only intended as a starting point but it is a good one! I was the one with the barriers and this book has offered me a new way to use my fears and see hope.
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