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conflict and marriage

Marriage Wrecker: Conflict
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
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Conflict can wreck your marriage. Don’t let it! Learn how conflict can help you improve your marriage, not destroy it.Over the last couple of episodes, I have been looking at what wrecks marriage.  First, I discussed Expectations.  Then, I discussed Disconnection.

In this episode, we look at another “Marriage Wrecker”:  Conflict.

Yes, I know, plenty of people will tell you that conflict is inevitable in marriage.  And it is certainly true that every marriage… any relationship that is as intimate as marriage… is going to include disagreements and differences-of-opinions.

That is not the question.  The question is, how do you deal with the disagreements?  How do you do conflict?  If you aren’t careful, conflict can wreck your marriage.

Why?  Because it often becomes adversarial — going for the win, not for the relationship.

In this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast, we look at how conflict can wreck your marriage… or how you can keep it from happening.

Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES
Marriage Wrecker:  Expectations
Marriage Wrecker:  Disconnection
The Role of Conflict
Fighting FOR Your Marriage
Conflict To Intimacy
Save The Marriage System

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Immutable Law Of Marriage: The Goal of Conflict is Progress
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
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Immutable Law of Marriage: The Goal of Conflict is Progress.When you have a disagreement, what is your goal?  What are you trying to do?  What are you aiming at?

For many people, the goal of a disagreement is to get your way, make your point, prove yourself right — win.

In any relationship, that can be damaging.  But most relationships can either weather that dynamic or aren’t important enough to matter.  Except for marriage.

When the goal of conflict in marriage is to win, the relationship suffers.  Sure, an individual can walk away, feeling good about the points scored or the advantage gained.  But the relationship suffers.  And over time, the relationship breaks down.

Let me suggest that in any conflict, the goal should be progress.  In a marriage, it is crucial that the goal is progress.

Why do we lose sight of this?  Let’s talk about it on this week’s podcast.

The Immutable Law of Marriage:  The Goal of Conflict is Progress.

Immutable Laws Of Marriage Series
#1 Marriage Is About Becoming A WE
#2 Marriage Is NOT A Vehicle for Happiness (Or Misery)
#3 We ALL Have Fear
#4 There Is NO Pause
#5 Connection Is The Lifeblood

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