Posts Tagged :

marriage myth

Marriage Lie #5: Your Spouse Should Make You Happy
150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

No, your spouse can’t make you happy… and you can’t make your spouse happy.  Quit trying and transform your relationship.You were probably very happy when you got married.  You believed the happiness would always be there.  And now, your spouse is saying, “I’m not happy.”  Embedded in that seems to be some idea that you are the cause of it.  That you failed at keeping your spouse happy.

No surprise.  Many people fall for this lie.  They don’t know it is a lie.  They believe it.  That a spouse should make you happy.

Somehow, it is in the job description for a spouse.  They should make you happy.

There is only one (little) problem with this… it is impossible!

You can’t make your spouse happy.  And your spouse can’t make you happy.

Sure, you can certainly make each other miserable.  But happy?  Nope.  Not possible.

Even if you thought you made each other happy before.  Sure, you may have been happy.  And your relationship may have seemed to be a source of joy.  But your spouse couldn’t and didn’t make you happy (nor could/did you make your spouse happy).

It is an impossibility.  But it is one of the major lies people believe about marriage.

Which is why people are in trouble when they realize that a spouse is not making them happy.  Instead of seeing it for what it is… a lie… they think it is a failure of the spouse — even of the marriage!  Proof that the marriage is headed for failure.

Except, it was all a lie.  Not the marriage!  The belief that a spouse would make you happy (and vice versa).

Don’t believe the lie!  Learn the truth in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Lie #1: If It’s Work, It’s Wrong
Lie #2:  Spouse Should Meet Your Needs
Lie #3:  Disagreement Is A Sign Of Trouble
Lie #4:  Marriage Is 50/50
Grab The Save The Marriage System