Close
Enter your
text here
How Values Can Save (Or Destroy) Your Marriage: #38 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

Save your marriage by talking about values.What happens when you and your spouse just don’t see eye-to-eye?  How do you get past it?

Perhaps the real issue is about values.  Do you and your spouse share the same values?  Or more precisely, do you and your spouse even talk about your values?

Many times, it is not a matter of values not matching, but of not understanding how your spouse expresses a value.

Or perhaps you believe you and your spouse share the same values, but never really clarified what you mean by the values each of you claim.

This week, I interview one of my very talented Relationship Coaches, Terri Hase, on how to get to the bottom of the values question.

Join Terri and me as we discuss values and how important they are in a marriage.  Oh, and if you want to contact Terri, you can find her at [email protected]

Let me know what you think in the comments area below!

 

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

The Power of The 4 P’s: #37 How To Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

You may be familiar with my 3 C’s of working on your marriage.  Today, we make a shift and look at the 4 P’s of maintaining your mindset and approach.

How do you save your marriage when you keep getting pulled off balance by the actions (or inactions) of your spouse?  You stick with the 4 P’s.  You shift your mindset to see that this can take some time, that you need to keep on moving forward, but thoughtfully.

“How” you ask?  By focusing on the 4 P’s.  Let me tell you about them in this week’s podcast.

Let me know how YOU stick with the 4 P’s in the comments area below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Are You Playing Mind Games. . . With Yourself?: #36 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

how to save your marriage and end your mind game.Mind games.  We all play them.  But what if you are playing the BIGGEST mind game with yourself?

I have news for you:  you are!  I know, because I often do the same thing.  In fact, not recognizing this important fact almost cost me my life!

There is a simple solution that can give you more peace and quiet in your life.  And the best part is that it is entirely under your control.

I want to tell you about the 3 steps to stopping this mind game, and then the 2 extra “fail safe” strategies, if those steps are not entirely successful.

You think yourself into difficulties and you can’t think your way out.  But there is a solution.

Please listen to the podcast (free audio) and let me know what you think.  You can leave comments just below.

 

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

The 10 Rules For Saving Your Marriage
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:
Still Feeling Stuck? Get Unstuck!: #34 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

How to save your marriage and get unstuck.Stuck.  Not a fun place to be.  But the reality is that “stuck” is really a feeling and not a reality.  You are only as stuck as you believe you are.

Does that mean you can get anything you want?  No.  But that does not mean you are stuck.  There is a crucial shift you need to make in order to get unstuck.

And that shift?  It is entirely within your control.  You can make that shift whenever you choose.  Or you can remain stuck.

Which will you choose?

Take a listen, then it is your turn.  How will you get unstuck?  Leave a comment below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

7 Steps To Dealing With Marital Expectations Gone Bad: #34 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

Save your marriage from unfair expectations.Expectations.  We all have them.  Some, we agree upon.  Some, we don’t even know we have (or that our spouse has them).  But they can play havoc on a relationship.

If you find yourself frustrated with your spouse over what he or she is not doing — or if your spouse is frustrated with YOU over what you are not doing (and perhaps didn’t know to do), you have fallen victim to expectations.

We don’t talk about expectations enough.  So, if you are trying to figure out how to save your marriage, but you keep stumbling on painful spots for each of you, it may be the minefield of hidden expectations.

Learn how to judge your own expectations — and what to do about them.  Then learn about how to deal with your spouse’s expectations, especially when you don’t think they are fair (I tell you the 7 steps to follow).

Let me know what you think in the comment area below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Boundaries For You And Your Relationship: #33 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

Do you know your boundaries?  Do you know the boundaries of your relationship?

Boundaries mark how you expect others to treat you.  It is a way of keeping yourself safe — and relationship boundaries keep your relationship safe.

Set your boundaries, save your marriage.I think about them like a fence.  If you build a fence in your backyard, you are letting others know where your property ends.

Can people cross over the fence?  Absolutely!  But at least you have been clear about it, and you can ask them to leave.  You can also invite them in.  They are not walls, keeping everyone away.

Most people have a difficult time making boundaries, and many do not even know they have boundaries.

Discover the 5 truths of boundaries and the 4 step process to set your own boundaries.

Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments area below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

What You May Not Know About Love, Respect, and Civility: #32 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

how to save your marriage from an affairI can’t tell you how many times I have had someone tell me, “I am no longer in love with my spouse.”  And while they are in my office, I get it.  They call each other names, insult each other, blame, are unloving, and disrespectful.

And in the midst of all that, there is a cycle:  “If you don’t show my love and respect, I won’t show you love and respect.”

A best-selling book, Love & Respect, Emerson Eggerichs says that men need respect more, and women need love more.  He says that men can be unloving while showing respect, and women can be disrespectful when showing love.  I think he is onto something.  But perhaps there is more to it.

In this week’s podcast, I take a look at the issue of love and respect, but also look at civility and courtesy as a basic platform.  If you feel unloved and/or disrespected (or your spouse feels that way), please listen.  There is an alternative.

Let me know what you think in the comments area below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Is It Too Late To Save Your Marriage? How To Know: #31 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

How to save your marriage. Should you quit or keep trying?How do you know whether to keep trying or to give up?  Why are some marriages impossible to save, while others just require more effort?  Are there factors that make a marriage harder to save than others?  Is there a time to stop trying?

I hear these questions every week, as people try to decide whether to keep up the effort or if it is just too late, and if they are too tired.

Let’s be very clear:  some marriages cannot be saved.  It has nothing to do with your efforts.  Perhaps the damage is too great or perhaps a spouse just cannot see the possibility.

There are some common reasons that make a marriage more difficult to save.  In this podcast, I discuss 5 complicators, so you know what you are up against. I also discuss why you might be feeling the need to give up, and how to decide if it is a good reason or not.

Take a listen and tell me what you think in the comments below!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

4 Mindset Shifts To Save Your Marriage: #30 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
By:

Take action to save your marriage.Your “mindset” is how you think about your world.  For the most part, a mindset is hidden from you. . . which is why it is a problem.  If you believe that you can or can’t do something, part of the issue is your mindset — especially if you think you can’t.

Do you find yourself stuck, unable to move forward with saving your marriage because you are not even sure if it is possible?  Or perhaps you are caught by a mindset of inaction.  You know you need to do something, but you do nothing.  Maybe you find yourself caught in “research mode,” looking for more info, but doing nothing.  Or do you find yourself scared to do anything, afraid it might not work and you might fail?

That’s all about your mindset!  And your mindset is something you can change.  In fact, there are several ways you can shift your mindset.

In this week’s podcast, I discuss 4 simple ways you can shift your thinking, which will shift your mindset, which will let you do what you need to do:  Save Your Marriage!

Let me know what you think.  Are there other ways you shift your own mindset?  Use the comments are below to let me know.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS