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are we too different to stay married

“Are We Too Opposite?”
150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

What does it mean when a spouse declares, “We are opposites. Our marriage can’t survive.” Are you “opposites”? Does being different doom your marriage? We discuss it in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast.Too many times — in my office, by email, on phone calls — I hear a spouse rationalizing their decision that the marriage cannot possibly succeed because, “We’re just opposites, too different to make it.”

But is it true?  Are you “opposites”?  (How are humans ever actually “opposite”?)  And for the sake of argument, does that doom your relationship?

In this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast, I answer a listener question that you may have, too.  This listener’s spouse has declared, “We are opposites,” and has given up on even trying to save their marriage.  This listener is wondering, “Is that true?  Are we opposites? Does that doom our marriage?”

Since this question comes up so often, I wanted to discuss the reality of this.  I cover my issues with “opposites,” discuss my theory of “Complimentarity,” and trample all over the belief in “compatibility,” an idea that has been espoused by dating sites and apps — and yet has failed in creating strong relationships.

Listen below for my response to “We’re Just Opposites.”

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