Switches or Dials?
https://savethemarriage.com/stmblog/wp-content/themes/corpus/images/empty/thumbnail.jpg 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/669b7e375d93f77521ddaba08adb8063?s=96&d=blank&r=pg
No, this isn’t some electrical engineering idea. Instead, it has more to do with human nature.
We often want to find the switch, the on/off switch for some situation. Turn off stress by doing this, turn on fitness by doing this. On or off. With a switch.
This causes us to be looking for some super-easy, simple solution… often to complex issues. Particularly when it is a marriage crisis.
A marriage — much less a marriage crisis — is not an on/off situation, and no simple switch will turn it around.
Yet that is what many people want. The solution that is as easy as flipping a switch.
Yes, your marriage can be saved and improved, but not with some simple switch. Instead, think about it as dials. Instead of a master switch, there can be a number of dials. Dialing up connection. Dialing down conflict. Dialing up warmth. Dialing down resentment.
We discuss this tendency to look for a switch — and the need to focus on the dials — in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast.
Listen below.
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