“Is It All About Being The ‘Nice Guy/Gal’?” – NOPE
https://savethemarriage.com/stmblog/wp-content/themes/corpus/images/empty/thumbnail.jpg 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/669b7e375d93f77521ddaba08adb8063?s=96&d=blank&r=pg
Many of my podcasts come from questions from listeners (if you have an idea for a podcast, email me here). And that is absolutely true this week. In fact, it is from an email I received.
The question was fair. So, I decided to respond for everyone to hear.
Here is the basic question: “Is your System really just about being the ‘nice guy’? If so, doesn’t that mean you get disrespected?” (I will read the email, minus identifying info, in the episode.)
So, yes, I do think being a nice person is a good start. But no, that is not the real point of my System. Being civil is a building block, a starting point.
Being a jerk is rarely a good start on rebuilding.
But the nice, that is just about being civil. Not a “push-over.” In fact, I believe having boundaries and setting them is critical. But so is having a high standard for yourself.
My whole System? Nope.
A good starting point? Absolutely. It always is.
But not if you just allow yourself to be walked on.
Listen to this episode for more details and explanation.
RELATED RESOURCES
Being Civil
Connection Is Lifeblood
Show Up
Apologies and Forgiving
Save The Marriage System
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: RSS