how to save marriage – Save The Marriage: Even if only YOU want to!

Knocked Down, Back Up

https://savethemarriage.com/stmblog/wp-content/themes/corpus/images/empty/thumbnail.jpg 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/669b7e375d93f77521ddaba08adb8063?s=96&d=blank&r=pg February 3, 2021 February 2, 2021

By: Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

February 3, 2021

You started working on saving your marriage. Good for you!

And then, you hit a bump. You get knocked down. Maybe you discovered an affair, physical or emotional. Maybe your spouse is irritable and upset. Maybe it is anger and resentment, yours or your spouse’s.

And it knocks you down.

Enough that you think it is over. That you are at the end.

But are you? Or do you need to get back up?

In most things in life, we think the process is (or should be) smooth. I fall for that myth all the time. I think a project is going to be easy and straightforward. Only to find a complication and difficulty at every turn.

And guess what? The same is true in your efforts to save your marriage.

We talk about how you might get knocked down… and how to get up again, in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast.

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Work on Me, Work on WE?

By: Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

August 14, 2019

What do you do if your spouse decides they need to work on themselves… and then they may (or may not) be willing to work on the marriage? What do you do if your spouse just refuses to work on your marriage?

That is the question of the week, asked by Sam. He said his wife wants to better herself. Then, maybe she would address the marriage.

As part of my series, answering your questions, I want to address this one. Because it might just be YOUR question, too! (If not, you can SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION HERE.)

Many times, when a marriage is in trouble, a spouse (or maybe you) just won’t address the relationship issues, insisting they (or you) need to work on themselves (or yourself) before looking at the marriage.

The binary question: “work on me or work on WE?” stands out. But does it have to be so binary. Is it really one or the other? Or is there another way to approach this?

If you try to force a spouse to work on the relationship, that won’t work… and might make things better. So, what CAN you do?

Listen to this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast for my response.

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