my spouse refuses to work on marriage – Save The Marriage: Even if only YOU want to!

How to Avoid a Blow-Up

https://savethemarriage.com/stmblog/wp-content/themes/corpus/images/empty/thumbnail.jpg 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/669b7e375d93f77521ddaba08adb8063?s=96&d=blank&r=pg May 19, 2021 May 18, 2021

By: Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

May 19, 2021

Slowly, slowly… you are making progress! You keep working on turning your marriage around… and it is working!

Maybe you think it isn’t moving fast enough. Or maybe you have just been holding all of those emotions, fears, and hurts, in… and they start to grow. You can feel it!

But you try hard not to let it out. To keep on moving forward. To keep on making connections.

Until…

Maybe it was something small…

Maybe it was yet one more little thing (or even a medium thing… maybe even a big thing!)…

And BOOM! You blow up!

You use a tone you wish you hadn’t. You say things you wish you hadn’t. You do things you wish you hadn’t.

BLOW UP!

… and then it passes.

But the damage is done.

Your efforts can feel like they have been in vain.

So, let’s talk about what to do BEFORE the blow-up! It is much easier to stay ahead of the problem than to catch up and rebuild after the problem.

Listen to this week’s podcast episode below.

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Why People Get Derailed

By: Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

March 6, 2019

When a marriage crisis hits, people kick into gear! They dig in and work on their relationship. Many times, they start to see results. Things are turning for the better. The relationship is warming. Things aren’t quite so hostile.

But then….

They get derailed. Thrown off-course. Lost in the crisis.

Not surprisingly, any gains made are quickly lost. Things become even more tense and fractured.

Why did they get derailed? Four reasons: Distracted, Distanced, Doubtful, and Discouraged.

I go into each of these… as well as how to avoid falling into the trap and getting derailed… in this week’s Save The Marriage Podcast. You can listen below.

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Is It “Too Little, Too Late”?

By: Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

March 30, 2016

You start working to save your marriage. You are working on rebuilding the connection. You have been trying to change and improve yourself. You’ve been focused. You’ve been putting in the effort.

And then, your spouse says, “Too little, too late.”

The bubble is burst, the sail’s deflated. Another kick in the gut.

And you feel like giving up. If it is hopeless, why even try?

Because I don’t think it is hopeless. I have seen MANY situations where a spouse says this, and the marriage is saved. (And yes, I have seen times when a spouse says this, and it turns out to be accurate.) There is one problem: you can’t know on this side of the crisis.

Sometimes, it is not “too little,” and it is not “too late.” It just isn’t over yet. The work is only underway, not completed.

I give 5 steps to moving beyond “too little, too late” in this podcast training. Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Apologize
Heal The Connection
Your Spouse Is NOT The Enemy
You Need A Plan
(if you have my System) VIP Program

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