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tricks to save marriage

Beware of “Easy” Tips and Tricks
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
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Saving your marriage is simple. That does not mean it is easy. Nor does it mean an easy trick or tip will work.It’s a common question.

And a dangerous question.

“Give me an easy trick or tip that will save my marriage.”  I heard it last week from a phone call.

Another one just wanted the “Cliff Notes” on saving their marriage.  No need to go in-depth.  Just an overview.  And “easy” way to save their marriage.

First, let me be clear:  I do believe that both people were quite sincere in their desires to save their marriage.  I think they both wanted to turn things around, to “fix” things.

But… they wanted the “short cut.”  No muss.  No fuss.  Just a quick way to turn it around.

Quick question:  just before you go into surgery, do you want to think your doctor just looked up a quick “tip” on your surgery — maybe just read the overview from a journal or book — or, would you rather know that the doctor had put in the time and effort to learn about how to do the surgery?

I know my answer.  I want him to KNOW what he is doing.  Not have a quick overview.

If it is just a book for a test, Cliff Notes!  I used them (I hate to admit).  But for something important?

We need to go in-depth.  Not to Ph.D. level (I did that so you don’t have to).  Enough, though, to be really doing the work.  Not just trying to get by and slide through the crisis.

The process of saving your marriage is actually pretty simple.  Which should never be confused with easy.  (I cover this in my book, How To Save Your Marriage In 3 Simple Steps.)

Don’t fall for the “easy tip/trick” or look for the easy answer.  Make it real.

This is what I discuss in this week’s Save The Marriage Podcast.  You can listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES
“I Saved My Marriage”
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Reverse Psychology
You Need A Plan
The Save The Marriage System

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The Trick to Saving Your Marriage. Careful. . . .: #41 Save Your Marriage Podcast
 150 150 Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.
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Look in the mirror while you save your marriage.Are you working to save your marriage?  Are you trying to figure out the trick to doing that?

Be careful.

Yesterday, I sent an email out to a group, asking what their “burning question” was about how to save a marriage.

Within minutes, the emails started coming in.  By the end of the night, hundreds of emails were in my inbox.  They are still arriving today.

I asked the question for one simple reason:  I wanted to know what people might want to hear about or read about in my articles and podcasts.

There were some common themes about affairs and disconnected marriages.  There were concerns on how to communicate with a distant or angry spouse.  There were questions about how to approach issues like money, children, finances, forgiveness, and household responsibilities.

And there were questions about “tricks” or techniques to short-cut the process.  We all want that, don’t we?  The diet industry makes a fortune each year, parading out the latest tip or trick to turn that fat to muscle.

We all want the short-cuts, the most direct route to anything.  This is especially true about painful things — saving your marriage being one of those.

In this week’s podcast, I wanted to talk about how to save your marriage, but without falling into the “trap” of a “trick.”  Sometimes, those “tricks” really run counter to who we truly are.  We find ourselves making ethical and moral “adjustments” that leave us unable to feel good about looking in the mirror.

There are 5 points to keep in mind, as you work to save your marriage.  Listen and learn those 5 points.

Let me know if you would add others in the comments area below!

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